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Coping with a break up

Break ups can be tough no matter which end of the break up you’re on – it’s not an easy thing to go through. We’ve got some tips to help you cope.

break up

Breaking up doesn’t mean that you’re a failure

The end of a relationship doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with you.

  • Most of the time, no-one is to blame – it’s just that the relationship didn't work out.

  • It can take time and practice to find a relationship that works for you.

  • It doesn’t matter who you are or how old you are, it’s never easy to deal with the feelings and thoughts following a break up with someone you care about.

Breaking up can bring up a lot of different emotions

You could feel:

Sad

Angry

Relieved

Shocked

Guilty

Worried

Lonely

Confused

What might cause a break up?

There are lots of reasons why relationships break up. Here are a few:

  • You discover that you like or want different things

  • It feels like the relationship is moving too fast or too slow

  • You both have different ideas of what it should be like in a relationship

  • You’re still discovering who you are and who you want to be

  • You don’t get along very well

  • You don’t feel safe or comfortable

"Some days will be easier than others – but it’s important to try and take it one day at a time."

Breaking up well

Being the one to decide to break up can be really hard – especially if you're worried about hurting the other person.

Here’s some tips on how to end the relationship in a helpful way:

  • Avoid using social media or a text message to break up with someone

  • Try to break up with someone face to face or over the phone

  • Try not to tell someone who might break the news before you get a chance to tell the other person first

  • Choose a time and place that allows both of you to talk without any interruptions from other people

  • Be considerate and treat the other person how you would like to be treated

  • It’s important to be honest and clear about your reason for breaking up

  • Try to remain calm if the other person is angry or tearful

  • Stay true to yourself and your reasons for breaking up

  • Avoid posting details about your break up on social media

"With help and support, you can get through this.

You may end up even stronger than you were before."

Coping with a break up

Here are some ideas that might help you cope with a painful break-up:

Talk about it with someone you trust – don’t bottle it up
Remind yourself that you’re not alone - you can get through this
Surround yourself with people who care for you and who see your strengths
Try to learn from the experience
Keep busy doing the things you enjoy
Take care of yourself and stick to a routine
Focus on your positives - remind yourself of your good qualities
Give yourself some time to heal
The Breakup Shakeup app can help you find ways to deal with it all! It’s FREE to download from the App Store

It’s not always easy dealing with a break up

Talking to somebody can really help.

Remember, these feelings won’t last forever. In time things will get easier and you’ll start to move on.

If you need some help coping with a break up, give us a call, start a WebChat or email us today.

 

This content was last reviewed 14/02/2018

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