After a while it all got out of control. Eventually I made things worse for myself because I was getting so drunk I had no control over what I was doing. I was making mistakes that made me feel worse about myself. My silly solution to make things better and give me confidence to handle social situations was to drink more. Everyone began to know me as a 'party animal’, and 'getting messy' was my thing. Of course the drinking didn't fix anything and when my problems remained I got even more down on myself.

At the age of 15 my family was falling apart. I tried sharing it with my two closest friends and instead of being there for me they decided to tell the rest of the school. I shut down, I didn't go to school unless I was forced to. I started self harming and stealing alcohol from my mother's cupboard. At the age of 16, I started smoking pot. Then I met someone who was a little older and they made me realise that I didn't need pot to be happy.