1 in 5
people in Australia live with mental health issues every year
My child struggles with mental health
It's hard to know how to help your child when they're having mental health challenges. We're here to help.
Mental illnesses in kids and teens
If you're reading this page, it's likely you're concerned about your child's mental health.
First things first: well done for reaching out for support.
Secondly, know you're not alone in your experience. Mental illnesses in kids and teens are far more common than many people realise.
Having a child experiencing psychological distress is very challenging in many ways. Fortunately, many families have faced mental health challenges and found a way through.
The reality of mental health for young people
45%
of Australians will experience a mental health issue in their lifetime.
50%
of mental illness appears by age 14
75%
of mental illness appears by age 24
Mental health warning signs in kids & teens
Mental health warning signs can vary depending on the age of your child, their personality, and many other things. Here are some factors that might indicate they need extra support right now:
- Not acting like themselves
- Changes in sleeping or eating
- Avoiding people or social situations they used to enjoy
- More emotional than usual: anger, worry, sadness and crying
- They aren't performing as well at school as they used to
- Lacking energy or motivation to do everyday tasks
- Self-harming
- Drug and alcohol use or other risky behaviour
- Feeling hopeless about the future
- They tell you that they're anxious, depressed, or struggling
You know your child best. If your gut feeling is that something isn’t quite right, trust it – and never do nothing.
Do you know how to safely talk to a child about mental health?
Watch our FREE recorded webinar and learn from a qualified Kids Helpline counsellor about how to support a young person when things get ‘too much’.
Topics include:
- The stuff your teen doesn’t tell you
- Secrets of the teen brain
- A counsellor’s tips for mental health
The power of prevention and early intervention in mental health
Mental health exists on a spectrum. At one end are people who are thriving and flourishing. At the other end sits mental ill-health.
It’s normal for people to move up and down at different times in their life.
Good mental health isn’t the absence of a mental illness. Children and young people who feel a bit ‘meh’, like nothing really excites them anymore, and like they’re just tired and ‘over it’ may be languishing – and this increases their risk of developing an anxiety disorder and doubles their chances of becoming depressed.
It’s never too early to get professional help and support. Think of mental health a bit like a sport: even the best athletes have a coach to help them maintain and improve their physical health and performance.
Mental health support is like that – a bit of support here or there, even if things are good, or when things are starting to feel a bit so-so, can help prevent things getting worse.
Risks for mental health in young people
Mental health is really complex, and there’s no single cause of mental illnesses. Factors that can increase a child's vulnerability to developing a mental health condition include:
social (breakups, friend or family conflict, moving school or home)
biological (genetics, family history)
physical (diet low in nutrients, poor quality or lack of sleep, low levels of exercise, medical, pain issues or injuries, etc)
Protective factors for mental health in young people
Fortunately, there are lots of things that prevent young people from developing a mental health issue or can play a big role in treatment and recovery. These include things like:
physical (nutrient-rich diet, enough and good quality sleep, regular exercise)
psychological (coping strategies, stress management strategies, strategies to develop resilience, interests and hobbies)
social (connections and relationships with family and friends; in fact, good quality relationships are one of the best predictors of good mental health, and mental illness recovery
Mental health support options
Here are a few places to start:
GPs
can run tests, diagnose, refer to other professionals and discuss treatment options – this is important, because mental health symptoms can have a physical cause, like a nutrient deficiency
Kids Helpline counsellors
can talk to your child 24/7 – counselling can help by reducing stress, addressing lifestyle factors that increase risk, and teaching new skills/strategies (which can build new brain pathways)
Psychologists
can diagnose, teach strategies and provide mental health support
School counsellors
can support your child at school
It's ok to feel stuck or confused about how to help at times
What parents can do at home
Fortunately there are some small but powerful things you can do to help:
- Learn more about mental health by researching online, books, and talking to experts.
- Don't be afraid to have conversations – choose a quiet place and a time where you're both relaxed. Try and ask, "Is there anything you wanted to talk about? You haven't really seemed yourself lately."
- Remember that fear of being judged or treated differently can stop kids opening up at first.
- Kids may struggle finding the words to express how they feel. Be patient and encouraging.
- If they aren't ready to talk things through it’s ok. Try not to push.
- Take their feelings seriously; if your child shares that things aren't ok, get professional support – especially if your child talks about feeling hopeless and/or thoughts of suicide.
- Let your kids know that they're not alone, they are understood, and help is available.
Will my child struggle for the rest of their life?
Some people do have a mental health issue for life, but many don’t. People can completely recover from many different mental health issues. For those people who have a lifetime diagnosis, there are many things that can help them have a great quality of life.
What will other people think?
Mental health stigma is unfortunately still alive and well. It’s understandable if you’re worried that your child might be judged or mistreated as a result of having a mental health issue.
The good news is that awareness and support of mental health has increased greatly. And you can be a role model for your child, and for other people, around supporting a young person with a mental health issue. Many people who go through mental health issues experience changes in relationships in positive ways, too!
Does my child having a mental illness make me a bad parent?
Absolutely not! In general, reflecting on your parenting, feeling bad about things, etc. and even being here reading this article, shows that you have insight and care about your child/ren.
Let’s just say for argument’s sake that you were a terrible parent. We know (according to research) that mental health has many causes. There are people who have terrible parents and childhoods, who grow up resilient and with great mental health. And there are people with amazing parents, who have mental health issues.
The most important moment is the present one. If you’ve made mistakes, or used a parenting style that you think may not have been the best, it’s not too late to do things differently.
All relationships have rupture and repair – and it’s the comeback that counts! You have an opportunity to support your child through a tough time. That's a privilege and chance to strengthen and deepen your relationship.
Will professionals judge me/blame me for my child's mental illness?
There's a misconception that psychologists and counsellors will 'blame the parents'. There's also a misconception that people go to therapy and talk badly about people in their lives (painting them in a bad light).
Most people in therapy or counselling are there trying to gain insight into themselves and solve problems. People in counselling are generally very open, honest, empathetic towards others in their lives, and reflective on their own behaviour.
Professionals are trained to look at things holistically. Counsellors want to work collaboratively with people we talk to ensure the best outcome for them.
We know that one of the most important relationships in anyone's life is their relationship with their parents, and that you cannot overestimate the value of having a parent who cares.
Parents are often the unsung heroes in the lives of young people with mental health issues and deserve so much credit.
Does my child having a mental illness make me a bad parent?
Absolutely not! In general, reflecting on your parenting, feeling bad about things, etc. and even being here reading this article, shows that you have insight and care about your child/ren.
Let’s just say for argument’s sake that you were a terrible parent. We know (according to research) that mental health has many causes. There are people who have terrible parents and childhoods, who grow up resilient and with great mental health. And there are people with amazing parents, who have mental health issues.
The most important moment is the present one. If you’ve made mistakes, or used a parenting style that you think may not have been the best, it’s not too late to do things differently.
All relationships have rupture and repair – and it’s the comeback that counts! You have an opportunity to support your child through a tough time. That's a privilege and chance to strengthen and deepen your relationship.
Counselling and crisis support
You're not expected to be their counsellor or to know exactly what to do. Reaching out for professional support is important for your wellbeing and the wellbeing of your child.
Here are some more counselling and crisis support options:
Call Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800 (for young people up to the age of 25)
Call the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467 (for people over the age of 15)
Make an appointment to see a GP, psychologist or counsellor
Give Parentline a call in your local State or Territory
Find more digital services and resources at Head to Health
How long can they wait when in crisis?
Nearly 70% of all Kids Helpline counselling sessions are provided outside normal business hours, late in the evening or over the weekend.
Our professional counsellors are often the last line of support when there is limited after-hours mental health support available.
This content was last reviewed 03/03/2024
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